Risk for a Fairy Tale Ending
I laid in bed, tossing and turning. The Fall air smelled like the pine and evergreen trees, as the wind swept their essence through my bedroom window. Frogs invaded our condo complexes water feature every summer, and the croaks they made were exceptionally loud. Our green friends lingered later than usual as it was the beginning of September. On a night like this normally I would drift into sleep quickly; it was the perfect cool temperature to sleep with just a sheet, and the croaking was normalized to me as if it were white noise to fall asleep to. However, this night I couldn’t sleep. I was about to make the hardest, and riskiest decision of my life.
My roommate had quickly become my best friend. I was able to confide in him, and he earned a great deal of my trust. He had asked me to come to bed with him. His cold blue eyes pierced right through me, and I was unable to tell if they were eyes to trust or fear. I was shocked. He was bold and acting unlike I had ever seen him. Shy, quiet, harmless, are all words I would use to describe Joey. In that moment he was unashamed, brazen, and very forward. Joey is tall, and in that moment it were as if he grew even taller, towering over me. I wondered where my roommate went, and who this guy standing next to me was. What had happened is he took all the knowledge he had gained by being my best friend, and used it against me. I gave him all the ammo he needed to woo me. He was putting the moves on as if it were a last stand.
I got out of bed, knowing I would not be able to get any sleep if I stayed stewing. I grabbed my pillow and pitter pattered down the hall. I remember the laminate floor being cool on my feet. As I progressed down the hall, I wondered which was louder, my feet on the floor or my heart beating. I positioned myself in his doorway, hugging my pillow, and I told him that it would be cuddles only, but I would join him in going to bed.
I laid next to him, and though of what life had been like for the last few months. A mystery man from Tennessee had come to live with me. Although I had met him before and we had a mutual friend or two, there was much I did not know about him. He arrived a sweet, and broken man who was down on his luck. I felt his warmth radiating onto me, as I thought back of how fragile he was when he first moved in. Fear struck me, have I made a huge mistake?
Cuddles and kisses ensued. He was warm, and soft. He instantly made me feel safe. In the back of my mind I was still questioning if this was right. I kept asking myself did I just screw up? I cared about him and I didn’t want to hurt him. We had made such progress from the broken man getting off the bus from back east. I knew at that point I was not looking for anything serious. I was taking a risk with my best friend’s heart, and it was a large gamble. I sat him down and told him not to expect anything to come out of this. I insured he knew there was no guarantee. I guess it is only retroactively I realize how much I cared for him before we began dating.
A light hearted relationship turned serious in the blink of an eye. We spent every possible moment together. We became an unstoppable team. In mere weeks we were already finishing each other sentences and having whole conversations with our lips sealed. Next thing I knew we were engaged and moving back to my hometown, into my parent’s house to plan a wedding.
We had a quaint backyard wedding with about fifty attending. My grandparents married us, and my mother did the catering. My cousin owns a cake shop so her wedding gift to us was the most scrumptious cake. Our cake was a tiered cake, with chocolate and pink champagne flavors. The cake was moist and full of rich flavor, and a great color pink to match our black and pink theme. We took a small honeymoon to Rhode Island, and spent the weekend together before he had to return to work.
We have since moved out of my parents and live on our own. We have become functioning adults, who are happily married with family blessings. Neither of us can recall a time in which we were happier. We live with our cat loaf who is our only planned dependant for now. Who knows what the future holds for us and we are both okay with that as long as we are with one another.
Life is short, and sometimes it is appropriate to gamble. My big risk had a big pay off. Although I feared hurting a dear friend by breaking his heart, I took a chance. I know to this day, the risk was worth it, even if I question how it initially started, and the choices made that night. I am grateful for all the risks made that night, him for approaching me like that, and me for following through. I am grateful because although I have never had or never will have a fairy tale life, I did get a happily ever after.
